Three more days...

...until classes start. Oh boy. I am already going insane with anticipation, fear, and a whole bunch of emotions I have no words for. Looking back on my pathetically short summer, I am saddened by the amount of time wasted. Sure, I managed to get two jobs towards the end, but there were those two wasted months before. No direction, no purpose: the problem I have with summer vacation. Well, there are still two more days left and (in pathetic teen movie declaration mode) I will make the best of it, even though I have to work from 8-2 in the morning on Saturday night and 8-12 in the morning on Sunday night...

...

Tomorrow will be better,
but tonight, I will cry.
Among the sea of memories,
I will drift, on my back,
eyes to the stars, still
firmly entrenched in the past.

Good night, and good luck

I knew this was coming. Something I have been avoiding thinking about since graduation. When my friends begin their departure from this town onto bigger and better things. When I could no longer call my best friend to see if he can come over and play for a little while... Oh, how I never grow up.

So, my school starts up in about a week, which means I can no longer dwell on these things I am thinking about right now. But, for the moment, I am in a daze, remembering the times I had we some of these great people who are leaving. I just hope that they come back sometime, just to say hi...


-Cecilio

The Ping Pong Song

Okay, so basically I've been singing this song out loud every time it plays on the radio. It's a guilty pleasure of my, and quite catchy. It's known as the "Do You Know (The Ping Pong Song)" in english.


Enrique Iglesias
"Dímelo"


Dímelo
Tú dímelo
Dímelo

¿Dímelo por que estas fuera de mi?
Y al mismo tiempo estas muy dentro
Dímelo sin hablar y hazme sentir todo lo que yo ya siento

Después yo te veo y tú me miras
Y Vamos a comernos nuestra vida
Yo no voy a conformarme inventándote
Siempre ha sido así
Por que yo no puedo despegarme de ti
Cuanto más quiero escaparme más me quedo
Mirándote a los ojos sin respirar
Esperando un solo gesto para empezar

¿Dímelo por que estas fuera de mí?
Y al mismo tiempo estas muy dentro
Dímelo sin hablar y hazme sentir todo lo que yo ya siento

Dímelo suave
Dímelo fuerte
Dímelo fuerte
Dímelo suave
Dímelo por fin de una vez

Me gusta de ti lo mucho que me gustas

Y que poco me perdono dentro de mí
No tenemos nada que perder
Y tenemos demasiado que vivir

Dímelo

Si yo no quiero o lo quiero dímelo y después olvídate de todo

Quiero

Las buenas nuevas siempre son así
Y las malas que se alejen de mi

¿Dímelo por que estas fuera de mí?
Y al mismo tiempo estas muy dentro
Dímelo sin hablar y hazme sentir todo lo que yo ya siento

Se repite coro

Dimelo, Dimelo, Dimelo

Se repite coro 2 veces

Dime que siii, Dime que siii, Dime que siii

Dimelo, Dimelo, Dimelo
Dimelo, Dimelo, Dimelo

why I will never drink...

So, these past few weeks have been quite interesting and formative. I've started working at two different jobs, friends are beginning to leave (possibly forever), and school is approaching faster with each passing day. Most people would use these reasons as an excuse to party harder and think less about the consequences of their actions because their freedom until next summer is coming to a close. Well, not me.

Sure, I would love to hang out at least once with every person who is leaving this town. Even people I never really knew. But yeah, not really.

Anyway, what does this have to do with drinking? Well, I know that people think alcohol is necessary to heighten the experience of hanging out and all that bullshit. I also know that some people think that they need alcohol to calm down after a hectic or stressful day. I also know that even though they wont admit it, they are forced to drink because of the people around them. Well, I would like to think that I am the opposite of that.

You see, the people around me that do drink have forced me into the conclusion that I will never try to drink in my life, ever. Period. I don't think that I need alcohol to get along with people. I know I don't need it, in fact. I've heard the nonsensical ramblings of the drunkard, and would never want to be that pathetically wasted.

It's not that I'm some right wing crazy who thinks drinking should be banned. It's just my personal opinion that my life will be better if I never drink, ever. I know I've told some people that I have taken a few sips of different brews, but in reality, I was lying. I have never drank anything. It just shows you how the pressures of trying to fit in forced me to lie just so people would think that I was cool with it. That I knew what is going on. That I can fit in. What a load of crap.

Anyway, I know that over the course of my life, it will be difficult to live up to this declaration. I just hope that because I actually wrote it down, I can look back on the resolve I had at this very moment and maybe, in my moments of weakness, gain some sort of perspective. Good night, and good luck.


-Cecilio

almost...there...

The rough draft is almost done. I'll be starting the second draft tomorrow. Everything is coming together. The time for glory is now. Hah...

why are you reading this?

Wow, I never thought I could be this tired... Anyway, today was my first day of a whole day of work. Yeah. Wonderful. Two jobs. Am I crazy. Probably. Holy crap. 8am-5:30pm. Good grief. I just hope I get a fat ass paycheck at the end of the month...

update

35 pages and counting on my script/screenplay/novella/story on Davis. I'm finally starting on the final scenes. It's all in my head, I just need to write it down... I can see the light...


-Cecilio

to clear things up...

I'm not actually a Giants fan. I'm not really a Barry Bonds fan. In fact, I've pretty much hated Bonds all my life. My dad is the Giants fan, I'm the Oakland A's fan. However, I do believe that in this country, men are innocent until proven guilty. And until it is proven, not just conjectured, that Bonds used steroids, he will remain the home run king. His accomplishment last night was indeed a monumental moment in baseball history, and will remain so forever, or until someone breaks Bonds' record. Just my thoughts...


-Cecilio

Barry Bonds...

...is now the all time home run king. The sole holder of the most hallowed record in sports today. 756. He stands all alone at the top. Whether or not you are a fan of him, his accomplishment is undeniably a momentous day.

one more thing...

I hate getting shots... They always seem to hurt more than they should >.<

O Green World...

This post will deal with the strange phenomena known as "love." More specifically, the kiss kiss bang bang type. Yeah...


In my limited experience in love, I've managed to learn quite a few things, I think. One, you will never know you are truly in love until you fall out of it. Two, everyone in love is stupid. Why? Because to be that open with someone can only lead to the worst heartache one has ever felt before. The more you let them in, the deeper they entrench in the makeup of your soul, and the more they will rip out when they leave.

Of course, I would have to ask, why would someone set themselves up for something as foolish as love? Why waste your precious time searching for something that you know will more than likely hurt you later on? I haven't really found any reasonable answers, but something I do know is that I want to be that foolish. I guess it's human nature or some crap like that, but I want to experience that.

It's the mistakes we make that define us. Sure, we can learn from others experiences and stories, but our own experiences are unique, especially in our own eyes. That is why, I think, we always think our love is special. "Our love is special!" Because it is, and is not. It is because of how personal our feelings are. It is not because there will always be someone who shares those same feelings. Who is willing to set themselves up for that potential heartache.

We will search for that person, far and wide, when really, that person may be right here, across the room, the other side of the phone, stuff like that. Of course, only the lucky sometimes find that person right under their nose. Unfortunately, most of the lucky are also stupid, and the whole fucking cycle repeats itself...


-Cecilio

summer weekends

Nothing ever gets done... Well, nothing too important.

I wish I could remember my dreams longer than the 2 minutes after I wake up...


-Cecilio

Politics...

So, I am a registered Democrat now. Not that I like them any better than Republicans... Anyway, the only reason I registered as a Democrat was to be able to vote for BARACK OBAMA in the primaries. Not that he's any different than any of the other candidates right now, other than his skin color. It's just that, I think he has the potential to be a good president. Nothing really special, not yet. You know, he's been saying the same shit, it's just from a different asshole. He needs to do something, take a stand, make a statement, something that separates him from the pack. Just my thinking...

Holy crap

It's already August, which of course means (junior) college starts on the 27th. Only three weeks of summer left. I am torn, since I want to start school and begin a new experience, but I also don't want things to change. How pathetic...

Fire Coming Out Of The Monkey's Head

Little images that inspire as well as disturb you. Inspire because of the imagery. Disturb because you are actually thinking about it...

I am in need of some inspiration right now. Not any spiritual awakening, just something to prove that there is hope for humanity...


-Cecilio